Greetings, all!
Mars here…
…The man with the BIG pen and the even BIGGER mouth!
And speakin’ of “BIG”, today… I’d like to talk to you about the BIGGEST piece of anti-American propaganda to come out of the fake-stream media, to date.
This is one of the most hilarious and epic fails of the entire year.
Let’s talk about ABC News reporter, Brian Ross, announcing to the world, that General Flynn was going to testify AGAINST President Trump.
One second…
This just in.
The Center for Disease Control has uncovered the source of a new… brain eating super-virus.
Aw, man…
It’s hit both the east and west coasts of the United States…
OK… um… the name is a bit hard to pronounce…
Li…
Lie-bor…
Hmmm…
Ah… Liberal-loony-itis…
Yeah… That’s it… LIBERAL-LOONY-ITIS!
As reported by ABC news, this highly contagious brain eating super-virus has been tracked back to a handful of sources, but… uh… a primary source has now been officially declared at the disease’s ground zero…
…New York City—specifically in the studios The View.
Patient number one, Joy “the sky is falling” Behar, has literally begun to hallucinate and apparently entered into a zombie like fugue state, LIVE on air…
Here’s some shocking footage of the producer interrupting her, so she could bring us “breaking news” that’s gonna finally bring down president Trump once and for all.
So, THAT right there is the TEXTBOOK definition of FAKE NEWS…
Because, in reality Trump did not direct Michael Flynn to reach out to the Russians, BEFORE he was elected.
Turns out, he likely had him reach out to the Russians AFTER the election, which would have been part of hIs job. He did plead guilty to lying to the FBI and Trump actually fired him, but he lied about something that wasn’t even a crime.
So, Chicken Little Behar, and everybody at The View fell for ABC’s fake news, which they didn’t retract for several hours.
Hmmm…
By the way, that caused the stock market to drop 350 points, because Wall Street traders started fearing that Trump might actually be impeached.
Uh oh Spaghettios!
And we’ve all seen this kind of agenda-driven FAKERY spewing out of the mouths of… Don Lemon… Wolf Blitzer and… uh… Rachel Maddow… just to name a few, but this latest episode Liberal-loony-itis is UN-freakin-precedented.
You have a MAJOR news network releasing COMPLETELY false statements about criminal behaviour by the President.
Yeah, that really happened… ABC got lectured, by CNN of all people, for spreading totally FAKE NEWS!
This was a blatant, FAKE NEWS lie, perpetrated to create an “AH HA GOTCHA” story against Donald Trump – and Chicken Little Behard is complicit.
‘Cause that… …raggedy Ann creature from the crypt is guilty of the very same thing by reading it – and still with AS YET, ZERO apology.
And look, there’s a HUGE difference between BREAKING an important emerging story and LYING to millions of people, to make a story REAL, because you wish it was.
See what I’m saying?
Here’s what I’m sayin’.
To want your president to fail is to want your country to fail.
Get that through your THICK liberal heads!
Wrong is wrong and right is right, NO MATTER…
Which…
Side…
You…
Are…
On!
I mean people like Chicken LIttle Behar hate Trump more than I’ve ever seen any group of human beings hate ANYONE!
It’s literally like… some kind of… brain eating disease or something.
And… when you don’t HATE Trump with ‘em, they’re like…
What are you on Team Trump?
Are you one of them?..
You’re a SITH LORD aren’t you?!
Holy shit Mace Windu calm the F down, homie!
Take…
A…
Breath…
That’s my advice to you, and ALL the people who hate Donald Trump so much.
Just breathe.
You’re all overplaying your hand.
By constantly elevating your agenda over reality, what you’re doing is – making Donald Trump look better… YEAH!
I mean, if you actually WANNA create the Galactic Emperor from Star Wars…
The way to do it is to CONSTANTLY over-react, so NO ONE listens when you actually DO have something legitimate to say.
You guys better start gettin’ it right…
Trump better start dressing Jango Fett clones up in stormtrooper costumes and and have ‘em chase separatists around the galaxy…
He better… send Anakin and a battalion of clone troopers to torch the Jedi Temple and kill innocent younglings…
Because, come 2020, I swear, if he’s anything short of Emperor Palpatine…
…If he’s not… sending a guy in black helmet and cape, with a deep raspy voice and a creepy respirator, out to force choke people and cut people down with a light saber.
…People are gonna be like, “Hmm… he did a pretty good job.”, and he’s gonna waltz into the White House, bringing to life your worst Liberal nightmare…
The sequel…
I mean, if you’re losin’ sleep at night right now… close your eyes for a second, and imagine a second term Donald Trump, with NO re-election at stake!
Are your eyes closed?
Are ya imaginin’ it?
OK…
Then CUT THE SHIT!
Because look, if Flynn actually had any REAL dirt on Donald Trump, Trump could just pardon him and this WHOLE thing wouldn’t exist.
It’s as simple as that.
So, as far as I’m concerned, the writing’s on the wall my dear liberal friends…
This Russia thing?
It’s LESS than a nothingburger…
Well, actually… technically, it’s MORE than a nothingburger, because if there were something that was less than nothing, then nothing wouldn’t be nothing, it would be something.
Nevermind…
You get it.
The Russian collusion thing is like… your… imaginary childhood friend, riding on the back of a unicorn, while EATING a nothingburger.
Know what I mean?
Here’s what I mean…
First of all, the indictment for lying, makes Flynn a worthless witness. Any attorney worth their weight in Nutter Butters could tear him to shreds on the stand. All they’d have to say is, “this is a guy who’s already admitted to lying. He’s doing this to save his son and himself.”
Second of all…
Get this through you THICK Trump-hatin’ liberal noggins…
Despite the fact that the FBI apparently picks and chooses who it prosecutes now, based on its own political agenda, it’s the President’s job is to tell them what to investigate and what not to investigate… plain and SIMPLE!
And lastly, even though Trump knows it’d be a mistake to fire Mueller, despite the fact that members of Mueller’s team have been caught sending out anti-Trump text messages, Dianne Feinstein and her cronies are completely wrong when they say “the POTUS can be removed from office for firing the director of the FBI.”
He actually cannot.
So, if you’re a Trumpy – or… ya know… just a regular American, who cares about our country and how this is all gonna play out, don’t worry too much.
Flynn lying to the FBI about these particular topics is not going to “bring Trump down.”
Eminem’s busy working on that (see Episode #5).
And, to me, the TELL ALL about this whole “Russia Collusion” issue is this…
In what realm of reality would Trump continue doing things like openly blasting the FBI, if he thought that there was even a REMOTE possibility that he might be culpable for any criminal wrongdoing?
He WOULDN’T!
Oh yeah… and the tweet that came from Trump’s Twitter account, the one that everyone so fixated on, that’s a NON-issue too.
Just because Trump says he had to fire Flynn because Flynn lied to the FBI… all the anti-Trumpers are like, “Aha! obstruction of justice. He knew that he lied to the FBI and still had him on his campaign.”
Yeah, well, there are a million ways to read that Tweet, but any way it goes… GOOD LUCK proving that Trump actually sent it, himself.
Bottom, bottom line… as far as I’m concerned, Joy Behar can go take long walk off a short pier…
Or better yet, a short walk off a short stool, with one end of Trump’s very long necktie around her neck, and the other end securely fastened to a… chandelier in liberal loony-toon celebrity home.
Trust me when I say, we’ll see her disappear shortly, because EVEN fake news ABC can’t afford to lose credibility on this big of a scale.
And, that’s about it for me.
I’ll let the rest of the drawing finish out here at high speed…
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See ya in the comments… and YES, I try to respond, even if you’re REALLY REALLY angry!”
Mars OUT!
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